When Social Media Spirals Fuel Anxiety: Helping Teens Break Free

Social media isn’t all bad. It can be fun and inspiring and a way to feel connected. But for a lot of young people, it can also feed comparison, self-doubt, and anxiety. One minute they’re laughing at a silly video, and the next minute they’re caught in a spiral of “I’m not good enough,” “everyone’s doing better than me,” “I’ll never be as good as them” etc.

It’s not about blaming phones or saying that social media is evil, it’s about understanding what happens in this spiral and how to gently guide them out of it.

Why Social Media Spirals Trigger Anxiety

When teens scroll, their brains get hit with constant images of “perfect” bodies, friendships, and achievements. And even when they know it’s filtered, edited, or staged, it still hits them pretty hard. Their nervous system starts telling them messages like you’re falling behind, you’re not enough, you don’t have what it takes and so on

What It Feels Like Inside the Scroll Spiral From A Teens Point Of View

“I go on TikTok for a quick laugh, but then I see people my age who look way better than me and suddenly I hate the way I look.”

“Everyone else seems to have friends, relationships, or a perfect life, and I’m just not enough.”

“If I don’t post, I feel invisible. But if I do post and nobody likes it, I feel like a total failure.”

“Even when I know it’s fake, it still gets to me.”

This is why it’s not as simple as “just get off your phone.” For a teen in this spiral, social media is tied up with belonging, self-worth, and identity.

Practical Ways to Support Without Shame

Here are a few ideas that can make a difference:

1. Help Them Notice the Spiral

Instead of “stop scrolling,” try helping them tune in:

“Hey, how do you feel after being on Instagram for a while - lighter or heavier?”

“What kind of posts lift you up, and which ones bring you down?”

This builds awareness without judgment.

2. Create a Reset Ritual

Encourage breaks that feel good rather than punishing. e.g:

Going for a walk

Playing music they love

Doing something with their hands (drawing, baking, kicking a ball)

It teaches their brain there are ways to calm down outside of the scroll.

3. Balance Their Feed

Encourage them to follow accounts that show realness, humour, or inspiration instead of just “highlight reels.” Small shifts in what they see every day can change how they feel.

4. Remind Them They’re Not Alone

When they believe “I’m the only one who feels this way,” the shame gets bigger. Let them know that feeling stuck in comparison is something so many people go through, even influencers and celebrities they admire.

A Gentle Reminder

Social media spirals don’t mean your teen is lazy, dramatic, or broken. It means their brain and nervous system are overwhelmed. With awareness, small steps, and encouragement, they can rebuild confidence and learn that they are more than enough.

When Extra Support Helps

Sometimes hearing this from someone outside the family makes it easier for teens to take in. That’s where I come in. Through 1:1 mentoring, I support young people who feel stuck in anxiety, low self-worth, and the “not good enough” spiral. Together, we work on building confidence, resilience, and belief in themselves so they can show up in their lives feeling calmer, stronger, and more like them. If you’re curious to see if it’s the right fit, you can book a free 15 minute Connection Call with me. No pressure, just a friendly chat to see what it's all about.

Click here to book your free call.

 Annabel 💛